A Week's Worth of "Guess the Quotes"

Well, after taking a brief hiatus from the SMS (due in part to a dreadful case of insomnia and an equally dreadful case of autumn blues), I started sending in e-mails to Steph again, and as has been the practice in the past, Steph often turns to my submissions as sources for "Guess the Quote." For those not familiar with the show, (and I must ask, "Why the heck have you not been listening to Steph and the mooks? If I can listen from my computer here in Tulsa, OK, there is absolutely no excuse for you, no matter where you live, to not tune into the Stephanie Miller Show every morning!") "Guess the Quote" is a game played between Steph and Jim "Voice Deity" Ward. Steph reads a quote and then Jim makes a wildly inaccurate and improbable guess as to who is responsible for the quote. Jim typically has a sub-theme in his answers and I enjoy trying to discern Jim's sub-theme almost as much as Chris "Boy Toy" Lavoie does. Anyway, it was a banner week for "Guess the Quotes" from Faye.
Here they are:

Monday, October 1, Hour 1 & Hour 3:

"Christ would not vote for Barack Obama, because Barack Obama has voted to behave in a way that it is inconceivable for Christ to have behaved."
Alan Keyes, Religious Fanatic, GOP Presidential Candidate and former Radio Talk Show Host

"It's about time we all faced up to the truth. If we accept the radical homosexual agenda, be it in the military or in marriage or in other areas of our lives, we are utterly destroying the concept of family."
Alan Keyes, Religious Fanatic

"When we, through our educational culture, through the media, through the entertainment culture, give our children the impression that human beings cannot control their passions, we are telling them, in effect, that human beings cannot be trusted with freedom."
Alan Keyes, Religious Fanatic

"On all the matters that touch upon the critical moral issues, Arnold Schwarzenegger is on the evil side."
Alan Keyes, Religious Fanatic

"Hitler and his supporters were Satanists and homosexuals. That's just a true statement. The notion that is involved in homosexuality, the unbridled sort of satisfaction of human passions" leads to "'totalitarianism,' 'Nazism,' and 'communism.'"
Alan Keyes, Religious Fanatic

Wednesday, October 3, Hour 1:

"Senator Larry Craig is attempting to withdraw his guilty plea. Wonder if his new defense has anything to do with Restless Leg Syndrome?"
Will Durst

"I admire the Islam. There's a lot of good principles in it. But I just have to say in all candor that since this nation was founded primarily on Christian principles, personally, I prefer someone who I know who has a solid grounding in my faith."
Senator John McCain (R - AZ)

"Each nation will design its own separate strategies for making progress toward achieving this long-term goal. These strategies will reflect each country's different energy resources, different stages of development and different economic needs."
George W. Bush

Thurdsday, October 4, Hour 1:

"What I am opposed to is a dumb war. What I am opposed to is a rash war. What I am opposed to is the cynical attempt by Richard Perle and Paul Wolfowitz and other armchair, weekend warriors in this administration to shove their own ideological agendas down our throats, irrespective of the costs in lives lost and in hardships borne."
Barack Obama, October 2, 2002

"Some seek to rewrite history. They argue that they weren't really voting for war, they were voting for inspectors, or for diplomacy. But the Congress, the Administration, the media, and the American people all understood what we were debating in the fall of 2002."
Barack Obama, October 2, 2007

"This was a vote about whether or not to go to war. That's the truth as we all understood it then, and as we need to understand it now. And we need to ask those who voted for the war: how can you give the President a blank check and then act surprised when he cashes it?" Barack Obama, October 2, 2007

Friday, October 5, Hour 2:

"Focus on the children. Their plight is our shame, I told him, and their promise is our future. Reach them and you reach our soul."
Reverend Jim Wallis, Author of God's Politics: Why the Right Gets It Wrong and the Left Doesn't Get It

"I don't understand poor people. I've never lived with poor people or been around poor people much. I don't understand what they think and feel about a lot of things. I'm just a white Republican guy who doesn't get it."
George W. Bush, after the election of 2000 was decided, but before his inauguration

"The money needed for expanding health care to poor children in America is far less than the money that has been lost and wasted on corruption in Iraq. How have the priorities strayed so far from those children, whom he once agreed were so central to the soul of the nation?"
Reverend Jim Wallis

"If he knows his Bible, the President should remember that Jesus said to suffer the little children. This, however, isn't exactly what he meant."
Reverend Jim Wallis