Sunday, December 28, 2008

The Year According to Stephanie

Well, as we prepare to say good-bye to 2008, I, along with the brilliant Velveeta Jones who blogs at, feel compelled to sum up the year that we all just lived through, in spite of the fact that we all just experienced the last year and unless we are struck by a nasty case of early onset Alzheimer's we all have the ability to recall the year that just passed.

But unless you are an obsessive fan of the Stephanie Miller Show as is your loyal radical militant librarian/blogger then there may have been a few moments in the last year of the Stephanie Miller Show that you may have missed. Fear not, your radical militant librarian has missed nary a minute of the SMS over the course of 2008. As you may recall, Ms. Miller was not at all happy with the previous year (2007) and took her friend and herself to Telluride, Colorado to shake off the awfulness that was 2007. It was in Telluride where Ms. Miller was rumored to have wed Dan Abrams, but that rumor, in spite of Ms. Miller's every desire, proved to be unfounded. Nevertheless, the year progressed with many TeeVee appearances by Ms. Miller, namely on "The Larr" (Larry King Live) with the occasional appearance on Howard Kurtz's Reliable Sources. However, Steph has yet to secure an invitation to her dream man's show Countdown with Keith Olbermann. All the while Steph had to sit on the sidelines, watching as her radio compadre, Rachel Maddow, was awarded her own show in the coveted time slot following Countdown on MSNBC.

Ms. Miller and CC Goldwater ended their run for the White House - we are not sure exactly when the campaign ended (and we assume neither do they). But there is still time to order your Goldwater/Miller gear from the Steph Store - hurry there is no telling how long it will be available. In spite of Ms. Miller's obvious TV appeal, she has yet to be mentioned - outside her own show - as a replacement for Alan Colmes on the now defunct "Hannity and Colmes." Nevertheless, Stephanie continues to pursue her perverse and curious obsession with Sean "Insanity" Hannity, taking text messages from him at all hours of the day and night, thereby underscoring her pathetic social life. Stephanie has been reduced to holding house parties in order to get people into her life - she hosted numerous debate parties, an election night party and even had "friends" over to endure her homemade sauerkraut for Thanksgiving. She is reportedly trying to keep up with her 85 year old Republican mother over the Christmas holiday. She was overheard yelling "fore" at the local WeHo Country Club, and then saw delivered to her tee four boxes of chardonnay by one of the princesses who works the bar at the WeHo CC.

Speaking of WeHo, one of the highlights of Steph's year had to be the fact that she was named the Grand Marshall of the LA Gay Pride Parade in which she was mistaken for a Cher-look-alike drag queen and summarily dragged off the float where she was mugged by the crowd who dissed her make-up and positively laughed at her attempt at fashion (I mean, really, fishnets?).

Anyway, throughout the year Momma remained a loyal supporter of President-Elect Barack Obama and for that we thank you, Stephanie. You were a "Momma for Obama" from the get-go and your loyal support will no doubt NOT go unnoticed by the incoming administration. We will miss you when you move to Washington DC to become the new Wine Czar, but we thank you for all the laughs and wish you well in your new position. Who are we kidding? There are very few positions you haven't tried - am I right? Take care and have a fabulous 2009!!!

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